Funny Love Messages & Funny status, Best Flirty Messages, Indiandiary

Funny Love Messages & Funny status, Best Flirty Messages:- 


True love is like a pillow,,,,, You can hug it when you’re in trouble,,,,, You can cry on it when you’re in pain,,,,, You can embrace it when you’re happy,,,,, So when you need true love, Buy a pillow!


Never kiss a police officer, she will say,,,,,, hands up. Never kiss a doctor,,,,, she will say, next please….. Always kiss a teacher,,,, she will say, repeat it five times…!!


I want you to have a candle-lit dinner and….. say those magical three words to you… Pay the bill!!!


I have a crush on your mind,,,,, I fell for your personality and your looks are just a big bonus….!!


I have spent many sleepless nights in your love and I don’t,,,, want my son to do the same for your daughter…… so lets make them brother and sister….!!


Two bodies one feeling,,,,, two minds one thought,,,, two lips one kiss,,,, two hearts one love….!!


I wish love is like a baby shampoo it has,,,,, “No more tears formula.”

Best Flirty Messages


The police are on the way to arrest you for stealing my heart,,,,, hijacking my feelings, and driving me crazy. See you in court!!!


Girl : I Love you… Boy : (Starts Running)……………! Girl : (Running after him) …Why are u Running?…  Boy : To update my Relationship status on Facebook….!!

Boy: There’s just one thing I…. want to change about you Girl: What’s that? Boy: Your last name!


Your smile can be compared to a flower,,,,,, Your voice can be compared to a cuckoo, Your innocence to a child,,,,,,,,,, But in stupidity you have no comparison, You’re the best!!!


Be careful when a guy says he loves u from the bottom of his heart……. because he may still have enough space for other girls on top….!!


English professors would have been……. so indisputable if they had said,,,,, “A sentence is complete if only ,,,,,,,‘You, you and you’ makes it” With you, my life is complete. I love you….!!


Love is like peeing your pants everyone…….. can see it but only you can feel it….. Thanks for being the pee in my pants….!!


Love is like a fart…….. If you have to force it, it’s probably shit!!


Do you know what my favorite thing in the world is????? The second word of this text.


Your dad must have been a thief because…….. he stole all the stars in the sky and put them in your eyes!!!


I may annoy you, and you might want to kill me……. I give you permission, but on one condition…….. Don’t shoot me in the heart,,,, because that’s where you are!


Way to impress girl: Respect her,,,,,, honor her, love her, protect her,,,,,, care 4 her, obey her, sacrifice 4 her. How to impress a boy???? Just smile once …..!!

Best Flirty Messages


Funny Love Messages For Boyfriend & Girlfriend:-


Last night I hugged my pillow and dreamy of you…. I wish that someday I’d dream about my pillow and I’d be hugging you…….!!


Do you have a band aid ???  Cause I just scraped my knee falling for you???


I’m not a gambler but I’ve just allowed my heart……. and my mind to bet that I will never stop loving you…!!


Many crushes and flirts are better than….. one true love bcoz – monopoly is always damaging,,,,,, and – competition improves efficiency! Pure economic theory of Love ?


Love is the fart of every heart for when,,,,,,, held in doth pain thy host but when let out pains others most!!


They say a picture is worth a thousand words,,,,,,,, but when I look at yours, I’m speechless!!!


If you’re cute, you can call me baby If you’re nice,,,,,,,,,, you can call me sweetie But if you’re hot, you can call me tonight!!!


Mathematicians would have been very correct…….. if “You plus me” equals “Perfect Love”. Isn’t that what we are!! Thanks for being mine…!!


If I you were asked to make…… one wish today what would it be? mine would be that our love lasts until…… I see an orange in an apple tree.I love you!!


My heart to you is given and do give yours to me,,,,,, we’ll lock them up together and throw away the key…..!!

Girls are like internet domain names……. the ones I like are already taken…..!

Best Flirty Messages


You can fall from the sky you can,,,,, fall from a tree but the best way to fall is in love with me!!


I have had a really bad day……… and it always makes me feel better….. to see a pretty girl smile….. So would you smile for me?


When the night comes,,,, look at the sky, if you see a falling star don’t wonder why just make a wish trust me,,,, it will come true cause I did it and I found you!!


Don’t be sad when you see your ex-girlfriend flirting……. with someone else…. Come on dear,,,,,, Learn to donate your old toys to poor kids That’s called ATTITUDE!!!

Best Flirty Messages


Flirty Messages For Girlfriend or Bestie:-


Do you have a map???? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes……!!


You’ve got such a pretty butt!!! It’s a pity that you have to sit on it!!!


I wish I could be your homework,,,,, so you’ll spend time with me every night….!


Do you know that you would look great with two pounds less…… in my opinion those clothes weigh exactly two pounds!!!


I am a winner, for I found the happiest place of the universe……… No, it’s not Paris; neither it’s Disney land…..… It is your arms! So, are you willing to make me happiest person tonight???


Let’s commit the perfect crime,,,,,,, I’ll steal your heart and you steal mine….!!


I had a dream we were sexting,,,,,,, so I woke up and decided to turn it into a reality….!!


Can you see me? no? Turn around,,,, can you see me now? no? Turn again,,,, can you see me now?? I can see you because you have a special place in my heart!!


I wish I was the mirror of your room”… Then you would have stood in front of me every now and then!!


Are you hungry,,,, by any chance? I’m starving,,,,, but no one will agree to get Chipotle with me…!!

Best Flirty Messages


I need you 24 hours per day,,,,, 7 days per week, you are my incentive,,,, I live for you….!!


Is that love I see in your eyes,,,, or merely a reflection of mine??


I dream those eyes,,,, those lips, that face, that body… Ok, that’s a lot about Me!!! Why don’t you tell me something about you??


If we have the time to “like” each other’s Instagram pics,,,,, we have the time to text…!!


What can be better than looking into your eyes every day??? Only feeling your heart beat and being the…. reason for your happiness.


I really can’t wait until tomorrow…….. You keep getting more and more….. beautiful every damn single day!!


My lips whisper only your name,,,,, my heart misses only you and my eyes are looking in a crowd only for you.,,, I love you.,,!!


I’m making the first move when it comes to texting,,,,, so I’m expecting you to make the first move when it comes to kissing….!!

Best Flirty Messages


Flirty Messages For Her/Girlfriend:-


Hi, I’m Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me….!!


Your lips look lonely!! would they like to meet mine???


Are you a mum? I am not a dad!!! Maybe you could help me with that!!!


I dream of you last night…… who knew you could move like that??


If your heart was a prison,,,, I would like to be sentenced for life…!


You are lying in your bed now and……. I wish I were your pillow,,,,, which you hug every night….!!


Do your feet never hurt ???? … You are wondering around my thoughts all day long….!!


Let’s play 20 question. What’s your name??? What’s your favorite color? Wanna go out with me Saturday night???


I just wish I could give you a big, warm good night hug right now….. Sweet dreams beautiful….!!


Hey last time I looked at my keyboard,,,, I noticed that “u” and “i” are always together….!!


I agree with Dylan: I long to reach for you in the night…… lay lady lay… Sweet dreams…!!


You know, too much of anything is bad….. You are so adorable and that is bad for me because I am badly falling in love with you….!!


Why do I always think of you when….. I’m trying to concentrate on studying… Grrr, hate you so much right now!!!


Hey, I was wondering, do you believe in love at first sight??? Or do I need to walk by you again???

I’m so tired,<< I just snuggled up in bed. Thinking of you. Nighty night….!!

Dear, I am going to through a serious issue, And I am unable to get it rid of it. …. It is that I can’t stop thinking about you!!!!!!!!! You are over my mind for every little moment!!

Best Flirty Messages


Flirty Messages For Him/Boyfriend:-


How can I spell s_cess without “U” or c_tie, or _niq_e???? I can’t even have f_n or good l_ck without “U”. Looks like I just can’t s_rvive without… “U”!!!


People I know call me different names,,,, I do not actually care. But with you,,,, I’d prefer if you call me “mine”…!!


Congratulations! You got the role of the main man in my life,,,,, as a reward you receive a romantic date with me!!!


During maths I was thinking of you….. but I cannot calculate how much I love you!!


Come over,,,,, I have all your favorites….. Pizza, beer, and of course, ME….!!


You are busy now and I am dreaming…. about the day when I will keep you busy for the whole life….!!


People have started calling me a drunk….. But the reason I look so is not drinking alcohol, But I am totally intoxicated by you boy!!!


What would you do if I told you that…… I have an identical twin sister?


Hey cutie. Haven’t talked to you in awhile……. Thought I’d say hello!


Stop thinking about me!……. It’s hard isn’t it ?

Best Flirty Messages


Hello! What’s wrong with your phone???? I’ve been calling so many times……. It just keeps saying: “The subscriber you are trying…….. to reach is in your heart, check again!”


You know what, we are meant to be………. You are my Mr. Right and I will become your Mrs. Always Right………. Doesn’t that sound fun?


New rule has been introduced! ‘All smoking hot guys will be imprisoned” Oh dear,,,,,,,,, I am so worried for you,,,,,, Please go and hide somewhere!!!


Can’t stop thinking about you boy,,,,,,,, You were just fab in my last night’s dream! And that is still making me blush….!!


I’m trying on these new bras,,,,, but I need a second opinion….. Care to share your thoughts???


I’m wearing a colored bra today,,,,,, guess what color!


I love to walk with you!!!! Not because it is kinda sweet,,,,,, But because I love the jealous expressions of other,,,,,,, girls seeing me walking with a smoking hot guy……. So, where are we going on a walk?


I am absolutely addicted to you,,,,, baby, I need to see you every single day….!!

Best Flirty Messages


Best Flirty Messages:-


Sweet dreams…….. with me in them….!


It’s gotta be illegal….. to look that good!!


Are you free for the rest of your life???


I can’t taste my lips, could you do it for me???


Tonight hot dinner will be served: Menu is Beer,,,,, Chicken and ME!


I just heard a song on the radio,,,,,, and it describes our relationship perfectly….!!


I really like our friendship,,,,, but I was thinking……. maybe we could be friends with benefits???


When I saw you for the first time,,,,,, I though your name was Angel,,,,, because you look like you were sent from the sky!!!


Your mirror is way too lucky!!!! Every time you look into it,,,,, it gets to look back at you!!!

Best Flirty Messages


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